WORDS BY KHALID STRICKLAND a.k.a. BLACK PACINO
PHOTOS BY NICK SAGLIMBENI, JUSTIN BORUCKI, LIONEL DELUY & PLAYERS GIRLS PICTORIAL
As much as I’d like to believe that I have diverse taste when it comes to women, my homies claim that I have a “type.” They swear the chicks I dig have similar physical characteristics. I disagree with them but I’ll let you be the judge.
Peep these five chicks who really float my boat and you tell me if they look alike.
Let’s start with the one above. Her name is OBSESSION.
For the porn-impared, Obsession is a legendary adult-film star known for her otherworldly fellatio skills.
I nicknamed her “The Headmaster.”
True story: She made an appearance on the game-show Blind Date and the guy she chose didn’t know she was a porn-star. Why else would he kiss her and essentially suck 100 dicks?
Now that you’ve studied Exhibit A, answer me this:
Does Obsession look anything like the trophy-wife of my dreams, HOOPZ?
My homies think so but I just don’t see the similarities.
Well, they’re both finer than a thread of silk. Hoopz booty got bigger over time so now she got junk-in-the-trunk to challenge Obsession.
They’ve got a few things in common but it’s not like they could pass for sisters.
Moving right along, do either of those ladies look like top-notch SHOW magazine model, DIZNEE?
Even Governor David Patterson can see that these three women look nothing alike.
Diznee (a.k.a. Chelsea) is a lil’ taller than both Obsession and Hoopz… plus she’s a shade darker than them in case you didn’t notice. I pay attention to detail, na’mean?
And I know for sure that none of these chicks remotely resemble the Queens of MILFs, STACY DASH…
At 40, Ms. Dash ain’t even in the same age group as Hoopz and Diznee, so how they look alike? Obsession, the other sexy cougar of this group, wears her hair in braids. Stacy does not.
Need I say more?
In closing, I can state with confidence that none of these chicks look like the one & only AURORA JOLIE.
Also known as Nicara, Ms. Jolie is one of the most beloved pornstars in the biz. She’s a vaginal virgin who strictly performs oral and anal sex. Hey, I don’t make this stuff up… I just report it.
When she finally does have vaginal sex, it’ll be bigger than LeBron’s Decision. For her hour-long special, I’ll play the role of sportcaster Jim Gray and brown-nose… literally.
Aurora is a bit thicker than the rest of ‘em, so my accusers make a moot point.
Well, that’s my Fave Five.
This post will squash the notion that I have a type.
Ah, the sweet smell of vindication.
YEAH BLACK…YOU GOT A COMPLEX LOL DIZNEE MY FAVORITE THO!
Word. It would be fun to play in Diznee land.
That last issue of SHOW Black Lingerie may have had 3 different covers but I searched high & low for hers. I wouldn’t settle LOL
Ok first off, Aurora and hoops can pass for sisters because when I first saw the “Anal Queen” Aurora….I thought it was hoops. When I showed her clip to my boys all of them was like…”yo” was that hoops?
They do share a lil resemblence.
If Hoopz thickened-up she’d look just like Aurora.
They could stand side-by-side on some “Before & After” shit and no one would tell they’re different chicks.
Shit, I’d jump thru hoopz for Aurora (cue laugh-track)
I agree you have a complex cause I don’t really see any similarities at all! Well maybe in a few but not much if at all! Man Stacey Dash to that’s like the ultimate women right there! I don’t care if she damn near double my age O the things I would love to do to Stacey! She’s by far my favorite & you know I was melting so happy, geeked & everything else when she sent me a Happy B-Day shout through twitter for my B-Day last month! The only thing better would have been to spend it with her lol (1 can dream right?)
Did someone mention dreams?
Samurai wisdom time!
“It is a good viewpoint to see the world as a dream. When you have something like a nightmare, you will wake up and tell yourself that it was only a dream. It is said that the world that we live in is not different from this.” –Hagakure, Book of the Samurai
“I had a dream on the night of the twenty-eighth day of the twelfth month in the year of Shotoku. The content of the dream changed gradually to the extent that I strengthened my will. The condition of a person is revealed by his dreams. It would be good to make companions of your dreams and to put forth effort.” -Hagakure, Book of the Samurai
In other words, dreams are good LOL
What happy to the sexy brown skin sisters?
Diznee is bad, she’s make my list. and AURORA JOLIE (I saw too much of her not to luv her),
I would agree with you with Ms. Dash, but even I’m too dark for her, and it’s all good.
Nia Long and Rosa Acosta.
Man I like so many women, brown to light, my head is spinning.
“What happy to the sexy brown skin sisters?”
Uh oh. I see a Young Bergish, Slim Thuggish storm of controversy on the horizon.
For Stacey Dash I’d disguise myself like a white man, just like Dave Chappelle or Eddie Murphy.
I can pass for white. I’m in Starbucks like, every day.
The first three could pass off as sisters. Then the last two could pass off as sisters as well. I must say Mr. Strickland you may have a type.
However, they are just your fave five. As any good statistician would posit, who knows how wide the range of your spectrum is? (<—I know you like that line that's that St. John's education boy!) I mean asians, snow bunnies, native american (ever been to Buffalo? Man, I almost broke my neck going on a reservation with my man for some cigs). What about the west indians? I mean I could go on. Thus I give you a pass.
Plus, you shatter the clone theory with ::GULP:: Rosario Dawson. She don't look like none of them broads.
FULL DISCLOSURE: I'd fight a nigga for Hoopz! On some personal shit too! None of that It's-always-over-dough business. I would be that insecure dude walking around with his arm around her neck AT ALL TIMES! Mad doggin anybody looking at her!
“I would be that insecure dude walking around with his arm around her neck AT ALL TIMES! Mad doggin anybody looking at her!”
LMAO!!!
My man saw Sara Jay the other day at a street festival in downtown BK. She was wit a black dude & he was huggin’ her for dear life. As my boy said, “He had her handcuffed.” She’s a pornstar for Christ sake, exclusivity BEEN thrown out the window. Hope he ain’t kissin’ her LOL!!
Your St. John’s education has served you well, Rawse. And since you brought up a good point about “range of spectrum,” here’s some Art of War wisdom from Sun Tzu…
“There are not more than five musical notes, yet the combinations of these five give rise to more melodies than can ever be heard.
There are not more than five primary colors (blue, yellow, red, white, and black), yet in combination they produce more hues than can ever been seen.
There are not more than five cardinal tastes (sour, acrid, salt, sweet, bitter), yet combinations of them yield more flavors than can ever be tasted.
In battle, there are not more than two methods of attack–the direct and the indirect; yet these two in combination give rise to an endless series of maneuvers.”
That’s my “sittin on a crate in front of the bodega” education LOL
Aurora is a problem for sure. She can be suffocated.
Hell yeah. 7 days a week & twice on Sunday.
I think your taste is more varied than the 5 lovely’s pictured above but I do see the similarities between Obsession & Hoops and Diznee & Auroa Jolie. Shit the 1st pic of Jolie I thought WAS Stacey Dash. But what brother in this land of spoiled milk & honey hasn’t had a liking for a Light skinned wavy hair vixen? I blame the Man.
Hahahahaha!
Ah, “The Man.” That nefarious being who lurks in the shadows & fucks up everything for black people. Popeye’s ran outta chicken wings? Must be The Man. I didn’t get promoted to manager at Burger King? Damn The Man!!